Rain

Dear Rain,

Why must it rain today of all days?

I have been writing a lot more blog posts lately because apparently I’m the only human being people are interested in. Give me a break and stop sending me questions by the way. So you want to know whether I prefer sunny or rainy days. Honestly, I prefer sunny days over rainy days because constant rain is depressing. At least on sunny days, I can go to my favorite shady spot and relax there compared to the lousy rainy days I’m stuck in boring classrooms filled with other students. Everyone in the classroom will chat the lunch period away which ruins my perfect chance to take a nap. I hate rainy days because of this reason. But I also hate rainy days for getting me sick as well.

There was supposed to be an eighty percent chance of rain today so I was advised by little brother to bring an umbrella with me to school. My little brother likes to be prepared for school so he watches the news to see what the weather is like for the next day. But honestly it was not even raining that hard when I left the house so I did not open it or even use it. Unfortunately for me, the rain was getting worse and worse by the second and I had considered using the umbrella but being the lazy guy I am, I thought I could make it to class without having to open the umbrella and have to go through the trouble of closing it afterwards. Boy, was I wrong. I was so drenched that I had to change into my gym outfit and let my wet clothes dry. My best friend, Andy, asked what happened so I told him that I slipped and landed in a puddle. Because I had thought the truth would be too embarrassing. But Andy was not buying my story and just told me to admit that I hated umbrellas. To which I replied with an explanation of why umbrellas are despicable because of how wet my hands get when you open or close them, how I always have to hold on to them even when they are soaking wet because there is no place to put them on the bus or muni, and how I tend to eventually lose them somewhere and consequently have to buy a new one. Oh yeah, and people seem to always mistaken my umbrella for their own!

If I have an umbrella, I can rest anywhere.

I really dug myself into a ditch this time because Andy asked me to recall a time when the umbrella was useful to me. But all I could remember was the one time I leaned on an umbrella, pointed at the ground, as a cane. It was still raining after third period so I thought it would be cool that I can evolve like early birds and fishes. I wanted to evolve so I have skin that can repel the rain so I can’t get wet. Most importantly my new skin will substitute for my need for an umbrella. But I came to the conclusion that I was being naive and that I am only human so evolution is not an option for me. Andy came out and found me standing in the rain so he told me to give the umbrella a shot. At that point, I was ready to use the umbrella because I started sneezing like crazy so I gave in for the day. But if you thought I had learned my lesson already, think again. I ended up getting to school all wet again because I just thought that I could dodge between the raindrops, like the Flash, and make it to school without getting wet in the rain but to no avail. I tried other methods of avoiding the rain without an umbrella for another few days until I finally woke up with a sore throat and cold. While the cold was bad, the lesson learned was not. You win this time Umbrella.

-Listless Tony

P.S. You win this time Umbrella.